Seems simple right? Wrong.
Because the end of that phrase is "just as Christ loves The Church and gave himself up for her." WOW.. WOW.. .DOUBLE WOW! I mean, let's have some sympathy for husbands. If Mr. Husband wants to obey God by following what the Bible says... He discovers that the kind of love he should have for his wife is the kind of love Jesus has for the church. And boy have I heard sermons where men have been Bible-thumped to death with that verse. And I have heard many wives flinging that verse at their husbands as a way of winning an argument.
But.. so few people read the WHOLE THOUGHT. Jesus is not the Church's Puppet.. doing whatever we tell Him to do. The next verses complete the thought. Jesus purpose for giving up His life was to present us perfect and cleansed and righteous before GOD. Jesus gave up His life so that we could HAVE life, and be reconciled to our Father, God.
He lived HERE so that we could live THERE.
A husband who loves his wife will give up HIS life for the same reason. So many wives - especially those of us who want our marriages to be Christ focused - lose our focus when it comes to what real love is.
A husband who loves his wife gives up his life so that SHE will focus on THERE more than HERE. His concern for his family is to live his life here so that his family with be "there" - reunited with their Creator. FOREVER.
We have gotten it confused, I believe.. when we try to turn a husband in to a lifeless wimp of a man who gives up his God-given power in order to PLEASE his wife. Jesus didn't come to earth to PLEASE THE CHURCH. Jesus gave up His life in order to GIVE YOU LIFE. You may be a wife whose husband doesn't love her.
- When your husband doesn't love you - he does not focus on your soul. He does not make the will of God the will that matters in your home.
- When your husband doesn't love you he allows you to evaluate your lives based on what you have materially, rather than being focused on FOREVER.
- When your husband doesn't love you, he doesn't take a stand about what to allow in the home and what to protect you from.
- When your husband doesn't love you, he doesn't feed and care for you. He doesn't see to it that your soul is filled with the Bread of Life. He isn't concerned about whether or not rivers of Living Water are flowing from inside you.
If your husband is doing his best to guide your family in the ways and the will of God, you have a husband who loves you.
And... if your husband is not leading your family in the ways of the Lord... and isn't willing to give up his life for you...
Your Eternal Groom, Jesus, already has.
When your husband doesn't love you.... Jesus does.
I know, I know... you're thinking that doesn't help you get through life.
But..... it is. It really is. Jesus is more real than the husband who is breaking your heart. You can cry out to Him. He will hear you. If you do it every day, eventually, you will notice that "somehow" you heart doesn't hurt as much as it used to.
I love you.