Wednesday, July 20, 2016


Sometimes, on some days, in some marriages, the two people involved are living in a war zone. The disagreements between the husband and wife have become so all consuming, so overwhelming, so deep inside their hearts that the spouse becomes like an enemy.

My mother passed away in June of 2015.  I was a blessed daughter and woman to have grown up with such a wise and Godly mother.  She was a pastor's wife, and had so many younger women in her loving care.  I remember hearing her quote this Scripture to women whose husbands seemed like the enemy to them..... repeating the words of Jesus: 

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’  But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven." 

(Matthew 5:43-44)

Her words to these wives played over in my head on the days I felt so angry at my husband for one thing or another.  (Yes.. in 46 years of marriage...Mr. and Mrs. Older have had an argument or two.. or three... or fifty...or a thousand... really).

I don't know how your marriage is on a day to day basis, but I can tell you that some marriages are like two enemies.. two fighting rivals... who happen to live in the same house, and have the same children.  

Mom's voice rings in my head and in my heart as I can clearly hear her as she spoke to brokenhearted and angry wives, "Jesus wants us to love our enemies and pray for people who persecute us. So then, are you praying for your husband? Even though you think he is the enemy in your life? Even if he HAS become like an enemy to you... do you see that Jesus expects you to love your enemies?  Even when the enemy is your own husband? And while you feel you are being persecuted and mistreated by him... are you continuing to pray FOR him? Are you continuing to ask God to intervene?  If you don't pray for your husband, who will?"  

Let me give you some simple truth:  Only God understands WHY your husband is acting the way he is.  Only God understands what it will take to bring peace between the two of you. Only God can change hearts. Yours. And your husband's. 

And God will gladly HEAL every heart.  He longs to restore. Resurrect. Revive. 
Do you believe this?
It is the most simple, yet profound, Truth.
God can heal your heart. IF YOU LET HIM.

And so today, I challenge you to give it a try.  
The simple truth is that only prayer can change things in your marriage 
Only God can change things in your home.

Simple truth?  Yes.
THE Truth? Yes.

I understand it may be new to you.  So here's the way to begin:
Three times today.. just three time...  when you are getting ready to talk to someone about what a mean husband you have... turn those words toward God.
Three times today.. when your husband is being COMPLETELY unfair.. and mean-spirited... TALK TO GOD ABOU THE SITUATION... and not your husband.
Just three times a day.
Just a few minutes today.
When you feel that anger rising.. stop... and tell God.
"God, please help this anger. 
Please help my husband.
Please help our marriage.
Please take control of me, my anger, my husband and our family."

If you call yourself a follower of Jesus... a Christian.. remember that Jesus is not our "SUGGESTER."  

He doesn't SUGGEST that we love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us. 


Mrs. Older has discovered that this is the Simple Truth about those seasons when your husband is your enemy.

I love you all.
P.S. Thank you that even in my sabbatical from writing this blog you have continued to have your friends and family sign up to receive this via email. I do not take that lightly.  I am honored that you do so.


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