Tuesday, January 21, 2014


Look... I ain't gonna lie to you.  This blog is something I had trouble writing because I know it might hurt your feelings.  And I don't want to hurt your feelings.   But I have to be the faithful friend described in Proverbs 27:6.   I haven't spoken to every married woman on the planet, and I haven't spoken to most of them.. but I have spoken to lots of them and there is a one-word cancer eating at the heart of so many women that it needs to be exposed to the light and burned out in the glow of God's love and mercy.

IT SURPRISES ME HOW RARELY THE CHRISTIAN WORLD ADDRESSES IT AS A FOUNDATIONAL ROT IN MANY MARRIAGES.  IT'S  A ONE WORD PROBLEM that is at the root of many angry women.  Women who, with their own hands, tear down their homes.

We use other words instead of this word.  But God uses the word "COVET"
Jealous means you feel bad that someone has... or is... something you are not. It might make you feel a little inferior....
Envy comes close... but it still isn't as intense a word as "COVET"

COVET means you have an inner LUST FOR something.  It means that you go BEYOND feeling jealous that someone has something you don't.  It means you will not stop until YOU HAVE what they have.  It means you won't let your husband stop until HE GETS IT FOR YOU.
It's a LUST FOR IT -  LUST.  
We all know what lust is.  It a desire that becomes almost beyond our control.   And it is sin.

That's why God specifically used the word "COVET" as part of the Ten Commandments.  The TEN COMMANDMENTS!!!

One of the foundations of HIS LAW to us... at the very beginning... was to identify that we would covet the things our neighbors have.  And to identify it as SIN that SEPARATES US.  Right up there with not lying, or murdering.. is "coveting".   COVETING takes over the heart of a person and becomes as destructive as stealing, lying, adultery or murder.  It's one of the Big Ten No-No's of Humanity.  He says not to COVET your neighbor's:
  • spouse. 
  • house
  • land
  • ox... donkey...
  • OR ANYTHING that belongs to your neighbor.
In modern words it means, "Don't covet that your neighbor's husband makes more money than yours, or seems to be more loving than yours, or more spiritually mature than yours.  Don't LUST after the KIND OF husband your neighbor has.

At the same time, don't insist - AS IF YOU ARE ENTITLED TO - the kind of house your neighbor has... or the kind of furniture your neighbor has...or the pool... or wood floors... or car.... your neighbor has.  Don't COVET and LUST AFTER  -  the good reputation, or the high standing in church circles, or the successful children, or the vacations, or the ability to hire people to do the chores you have to do for yourself that your neighbor has.  As a matter of fact, people, don't covet ANY THING YOUR NEIGHBORS HAVE."

Now.. listen sweet young sisters... I am not JUDGING you.

I am simply reporting that in my years of talking to and dealing with women... most often.. their discontent begins in the secret covet.  And they hound their husbands, and beat them down, and complain...  because "Mary next door" just got something and she covets it and it willing to TEAR DOWN HER OWN MARRIAGE.. brick by coveting brick - to get it.

Listen... we've all been there and done that.
It's sin.
The good thing about calling something what it is  - SIN - is that the BLOOD OF JESUS can cleanse us INSTANTLY when we CONFESS our sin.
More next time.  Including a little quiz "Are You A Covetous Woman?"... and.. some Holy Spirit powered solutions.

"Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, 

because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”  

Hebrews 13:5
I love you...
And I thank you for telling your friends about this blog.
So many email followers... and I don't know where or how you are hearing about this.

Mrs. Older


  1. You are telling the truth. I applaud you.

  2. Great minds think alike! Just wrote about this today too! Great post.

  3. Elizabeth..... thank you.. love you woman of God. It brings hope for the future of womanhood that young women like you have the faith you have. XOXO... So happy I have signed up to receive your blog....

  4. Who are you? Why won't you tell us?

  5. Dear Anonymous,
    Who are YOU? Why won't you tell ME?