Saturday, August 10, 2013


Because I talk to so many of you. 
Because I write articles and hundreds of thousands of you read them and some of you send me emails.
Because I speak at conferences where I sit with some of you after the meeting... I know that all is not well in Christian marriages.
That's why I write this blog. 
Because of you.
Because... can I be honest?... because SO MANY CHRISTIAN HUSBANDS ARE JUST SO SELF CENTERED AND ARE NOT LOVING THEIR WIVES the way God intended.That's why.
O.K.  I just said it. O.K.?  O.K. 
Not all the time.. not all the time.. but sometimes... the truth is that we live in a country of compromising Christian men.  Yes. I said it again. Compromising Christian men.
Why is it that we aren't supposed to say that?
It isn't man bashing to tell the truth.
Men are not being told - not being told - how much they are REQUIRED to love their wives.
And so they aren't... They aren't loving their wives.
And they are wounding their wives.

Dear Wounded Wife,

God cares about your wounded heart.
He is standing right there with you.
THE TRAGEDY of it is that so many wives go to church and sit next to husbands who have absolutely no intention of doing anything about what God tells them they are supposed to do as a husband.   
And these husbands have pastors who are more concerned about whether or not the man is tithing than if he is loving his wife.  Yes. it's true.  (Dear pastor, you know it's true)
And God is seeing it all.
Seeing it all.

Dear wounded wife,
I would like to urge you ... STRONGLY URGE YOU to...
Talk to God again.
Tell Him. Again.
You don't believe it will do a thing?
He understands.


When HE becomes our ONLY hope
When HE becomes our ONLY answer
When HE becomes the ONLY One who can do anything about anything..
We are at the point where He can change things.
Because God wants us to rely COMPLETELY on HIM.
What? That's my answer? Yup.
It is a tragic turn of events when you tell a Christian man or woman that the answer to their problem is prayer... and they think you aren't giving them a viable answer.

You don't get answers?
Keep praying.

The problem is not in lack of answers FROM God
But lack of pray-ers TO God.

PRAYER IS simply talking to God.  And giving Him time to speak to your heart.
Yes.. He will give you the faith to believe He is able.
And wait for Him to do His work.
But over time..
As you keep trusting Him.Keep crying out to him. He will change that heart. Your husband's?  Maybe.Yours?
He will change you heart. And HIS LOVE will be enough.

Will you have a perfect marriage?  I don't know.
Will your husband ever love you the way he is supposed to?  I don't know.
But you won't care.
If you let God's love in.
Every time your heart feels like it will explode with sorrow... find a place to find His face.

And thanks for sending me emails.  I am getting so many new friends.
Email me at:
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Mrs. Older

1 comment:

  1. I have to admit that I rarely talk to God about the way my husband treats me. You describe him perfectly and I would say you describe our pastor pretty accurately. I have been very angry inside. But when this came to my email today it reminded me that I have not considered that God cares that I am not loved. Thank you. I feel a great weight taken off me today because I took the time to tell God.