Wednesday, June 27, 2012


You probably think I mean the words:  "I love you."   Nope.   Those words are important but  I would like to introduce three small words that I believe can be just as important - if left unsaid.  I have observed so many of us spending our lives, and so much spiritual and emotional energy.... doing whatever we can to AVOID having to say them.   They are: "I was wrong." 
Families fall apart and go their separate ways...  because someone refuses to say these three words.  People spend eternity separated from God because they refuse to say these three small words.  Children become exasperated and bitter toward parents who refuse to ever say these three words. Churches split, congregations fall apart because somebody refuses to say them.  Corporations explode, countries go to war.  Many times because someone cannot admit that they are the guilty one.

"I was wrong"  is not to be confused with "I am sorry." Saying "I am sorry"  CAN INCLUDE the thought that you were wrong but you can still think you were not completely wrong.   "I'm sorry" can mean "I'm sorry you were hurt by what I said or did" or  ""I'm sorry you were hurt by something I didn't say or do." It is possible to say the words "I'm sorry" and still don't believe you were wrong. 

When you say, "I was wrong" or "I am wrong" there is no further discussion or debate required.   it is the end of the discussion. Period.  The End.  You are stating truth and letting it fall where it may.

I can only imagine the FREEDOM in FAMILIES if parents would model these three words to their children. If a Mommy didn't brush it off when she has unfairly disciplined her child - and takes the time to say "I was wrong for sending you to your room.  You didn't deserve it.  I was grouchy about something else and took it out on you. Will you forgive me?  I was wrong."  I was blessed to have a mother who would and who will admit it when she is wrong.
What do you think that kid will think about you, Mom?
What do you think you are teaching that kid about mercy, Mom?
And what if your husband heard you say the same three words?  What if your kids heard you admit to you husband that you were completely wrong?  Only.. if you are of course..

It's true that not everyone is wrong all the time.  Not you.  Not me.  But sometimes someone is 100% wrong and sometimes that person is you.  And me.
It's freeing to admit it.
To you.
And to the people you have wronged.

I think that if more people would admit they are would diminish family arguments by leaps and bounds.
So.. just for tomorrow.. say it when it's true.
I love you.
Mrs. Older
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